Wow, this is definitely a loaded question, like Russian roulette. You might as well spin and pull the trigger, wondering what kind of outcome you’re going to get. Completely disastrous or another chance at life. If it’s just for a little while. Ask that question to me in person and you’ll probably end up with a lot of laughter then a quick one worded answer with no explanation, even when pushed for one. However, asking me over the internet is another thing altogether. I’ve always found it easier to explain my reasoning through writing rather than speaking, as weird as that may be.
Anyway, I don’t have a favorite part. I can find a fault with everything, no matter what it is. My hair isn’t shiny, long or blonde enough, my nails aren’t long or strong enough, my fingers and arms not skinny enough, my legs not skinny enough, my stomach not flat enough, my toes too big and the arch in my foot too high, my bum too big with weird freckles, my back too wide with too many freckles caused by the sun. Those are my main ‘problem’ areas, which is basically my whole body.
Today I am going back to my Nana’s house, preparing food for the weekend ahead. All week long I am going to be surrounded by food, unhealthy food that is going to be forced upon me, whether I want it or not. So right now I am coming up with a food plan for the next five days, hopefully I am strong enough to stick to it. If I don’t it’ll only prove how weak I really am. I’m wiping the slate clean, yesterday never happened as far as I’m concerned. There’s no pointing in clinging to the past when there’s nothing you can do to change it so I’m moving on.
For the whole week I am going to have no bread, candy, cakes or biscuits, no sweet stuff and no bananas. “But banana’s are fruit!” I can hear many of you saying, yes they are but did you know that bananas have more carbs than a serving of bread? Even though one serving of bread (for me) begins at 140 calories and the highest calories for a banana is 90, I’m not going to risk it. They are being cut from my life for a week.
So here’s to a week of no candy, no biscuits or cakes or pastries, no chocolate, no chips, no white bread, no fast food, no spreads and no ice cream. I’m even going to go one step further and say no salad dressings. I don’t need them. Salad is just as good without it. I know I can do this. My current weight is imprinted on my brain; 42.9, 42.9, 42.9. That must change by the end of the week, even if it’s just by two hundred grams. I need it to change. By the end of the week I want to be at 42.4kg. That’s a loss of a measly five hundred grams over seven days. In one week I will weigh myself to see if I’ve achieved my goal.
I can do it. Other girls can lose that in one day, if I can’t do it in one week then I’m never going to forgive myself. Ever.